One of my good friends also has a problem with attracting freaks. Unlike me, though, she attracts mass quantities of them. She also is very open minded and will go on a date with just about anyone, save men who have human skull collections and/or body odor. I have to give her credit, as she will continue to date someone to get to know him before she decides to cut him loose. Me, I will get annoyed and write someone off within a few minutes of a conversation. Then again, I’m perfectly content drinking myself into oblivion and dancing by my lonesome in a dark corner of a bar for hours on end. I’m also into facial hair and people who are “different.” I think I’ve made it clear that I have very obvious issues.
So my friend started dating this guy who was a bit older, but was attractive, a gentleman and they had fun together. In the beginning, she of course did the requisite name Googling and did not come up with a single hit. As things became more serious, she realized she had been spelling his last name incorrectly.
On a random Wednesday while bored at work she again Googled his name. And surprise surprise did she get some hits! Many hits. Of him. Naked. Pictures of him naked. On the Internet.
Naked. Pictures. Of. Boyfriend. On. The. Internet.
She flipped out and began sending me the links. I unsuspectingly opened them up at work and got some sweet shots of her boyfriend’s bare ass clad only in a tool belt. (Other shots included him climbing ladders
and hammering – isn’t it dangerous to perform carpentry naked???) I tried to quell the excitement, as I didn’t even know these types of naked construction worker pictures existed! I quickly saved the website as a favorite and called my frantic friend.
She eventually discussed the pictures with him and came to find out that, yes, many years ago he had posed nude for pictures and was even featured in Playgirl.
She continued to date him until things fell apart on their own accord. But now she can forever say she used to date a porn star. OK, so maybe he wasn’t a porn star. But pictures of his junk are on the Internet.
How cool is that?
If you’re going to Google someone’s name, make sure you spell it right. If you are on the fence about someone, knowing such a sweet ass exists under those jeans definitely makes your decision for you. Yes, please!
And thank you, friend, for sending me that link – it has really helped me out on some pretty lonely nights.