There are a lot of things I am not. Subtle? Not my strongest suit.
Graceful? If you think the lovechild of a rhino and a one-legged duck is graceful, then I’m your girl.
Fortunately for me (and all of you), I am a lot of things. One of which is fun. I love to have fun. I mean, I know most people THINK they like to have fun and are, in fact, having fun. But seriously, they’re not. If they’re not with me, they’re not really having fun.
Also, if you were wondering, modesty is not on the list of my character traits. I don’t really care. I’m self-aware.
And I’m a fucking...